Through my sessions, what I am doing with my patients is above all to guide them to realign with themselves in order to find more serenity personally, professionally or relationally in their life. But what is it to be aligned? What prevents us from finding balance and how do we get there?
It's creating on the outside what you really embody on the inside
For me, to be aligned is to be who we really are and to feel complete with ourselves. It is creating on the outside what we really embody on the inside in accordance with ourselves and our needs to feel unified and alive. It's reconnecting with ourselves to then manifest it and to be able to put things in place in a completely natural way by “co-creating” with the world around us. It is to be in action and in creation in the present moment by listening to our inner voice.
What does keep us from being aligned?
It happens that our limiting beliefs (I'm not good enough, I don't have the right to make mistakes, I have to be perfect to get there, I won't be able to do it alone,...), our fears (fear of missing out for example), or simply our difficulty to connect to our intuition and what we really are or want prevent us from being aligned. Thus, it can be complicated for us to make choices based on what is really right for us and we tend to get “stuck” and drift away from our life path and our real needs. We do things that do not fulfill us and we can make up for it with various addictions (emotional eating, binge-watching, alcohol, drugs, emotional dependence, etc.). For instance, the belief "I have to be perfect to get there" can prevent us from accomplishing our goals and put us in a state of total inaction.
How do we get stuck in limiting patterns?
According to my current understanding of things, our fears and our beliefs can, among other things, be the consequences of traumatic memories that have created and/or nourished wounds in us (abandonment, rejection, injustice, humiliation, etc.), whether it comes from our ancestors, ourselves, or both. An event can sometimes be so traumatic that we make the decision (often unconscious) never to relive it because it is too painful. That said, even if it helps us in the moment, in some cases, it can limit us for our personal realization and our balance if we do not free ourselves from it in the long term.
For example, the belief "I cannot make mistakes" may have been the result of an event that aroused in us an emotion that we did not accept to feel and digest. It might have been very difficult for us when we made a mistake (maybe we felt humiliated, eg). Consequently, we subconsciously decide never to do it again because we are afraid to reactivate the wound that the error committed has caused and we do not want to feel it anymore. However, we often tend to relive it despite ourselves.
Thus, we are sometimes stuck in certain patterns that tend to repeat themselves (while we seek to avoid them) without knowing how to "get rid" of them, we are controlling and we do not always manage to move forward on our life path in serenity. In this case, we might suffer of "excessive" perfectionism or we might not accomplish a project that is important to us and which would help us to be aligned because we are scared to make another mistake.
A limiting belief (a thought that we believe to be true) can also be passed on to us from our parents or our culture or have been created by a repetition of experiences that created a generalization. However, what is right for our family does not necessarily make sense for us and it is not because an event has repeated itself that it will always happen again.
The good news is that we can make the decision to stop conditioning ourselves to our limiting beliefs, fears and patterns in order to fulfill ourselves. In addition, we can equip ourselves to connect to our intuition.
How to realign?
As B.J. Palmer said, Healing is an inside job.
By medidating, by going back within ourselves (by taking time with ourselves) in order to create space for an inner dialogue. By learning to (re)know ourselves, to love ourselves, to discover our needs, what nourishes us and by listening to us. In this way, we align ourselves in the present to be in action according to who we really are and what we want to put in place in our life without seeking to compensate otherwise, to feed our ego or our limiting thoughts and beliefs.
By becoming aware of the fear patterns and limiting beliefs that prevent us from listening to ourselves and by making the decision to free ourselves from them. The first step to do it is to return to ourselves to understand what is happening. An emotion always has a message that refers to a need and it's not dangerous to go and listen to its message, it's liberating. If we repress our emotions in connection with these beliefs and fears, we maintain our suffering and we remain "blocked". We might also need to realize that it has "served" us in the past but that we have other resources to deal with it in our current life. And when we are going through a difficult event, it is important to feel our emotions instead of repressing them to avoid to create a new pattern.
If you ever need to be guided to reconnect, realign, move forward and/or get out of these patterns, it is with pleasure that I can help you!
As B.J. Palmer said, healing is first and foremost an inside job.